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Die Another Day
There are many things that are askew about Die Another Day, but the main problem has to be that Gustav Graves, the primary villain, is a knob. Unquestioningly, how does such a bad performance get somewhere its way to the screen? I guess the only exegesis is that the filmmakers liked it, which is a creepy thought to say the least.
Late in the movie, Graves says that he based his without a scratch persona on Bronson's Bond. However, Toby Stephens, the actor who plays Graves, seems to have been watching the imperfect tapes, because he plays his wonderful-villain like Roger Moore on steroids – the levels of smarm and egotism are toxic. But while Moore's one facial expressiveness was to raise his eyebrow, Stephens' one style is to sneer. In fact, he sneers so much that its almost as if he's perpetually inhaling an eggy fart. Perhaps that's why he's so keen to destroy the mankind.
But how does Graves referee to go about destroying the world? With a private volcano lair? With atomic submarines? No, he decides to stop the world by dressing up like RoboCop's effete sparse boy. I mean, come on, couldn't the writers reckon of something better than having Graves put a Lamplight Boy on his face and have him wear Legion of Karma shoulder pads? And that glove reaction is ridiculous. He's like Emperor Palpatine, reaching clockwise to kill people with his Electrified Help O Death. "Ultimate powar!"
But although Palpatine spouted his respectable share of nonsense in the Shooting star Wars prequels, he has nothing on Graves. Gems of half-wit ideology include: "It's only by being on the edge that we differentiate who we really are. Under the skin." And: "One of the virtues of never sleeping, mister Bond. I have to be...
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